Narcissism and the Emotional Mind
Self-awareness can be something we may lack in life. When we don’t have an adequate amount of self-awareness it leaves us vulnerable to narcissistic abuse. We feel emotions and we don’t understand why we feel them. We choose behaviors and we are puzzled about why we chose this. When you live your life without knowing the reasons behind it, you feel disconnected from your purpose and identity. How can we choose the best path for us if we don’t know who we are? Well, a narcissist is waiting close by for that answer. Most of the time it is our subconscious brain that is making the choices. We attract toxic relationships without really understanding why. We are living our lives based solely with our emotion mind. We typically make decisions that align with our negative core beliefs (how we feel about ourselves) at the subconscious level. If you find that you are in a toxic situation, it is better to recognize and own the fact that you have put yourself there and that you continue to put yourself there. If you are wondering why you are continuing with that addiction, why you are giving chance after chance, or why you keep trying to people please, then it is important to acknowledge that you are making this choice. We make the choices that we think we deserve. We are responsible for staying and we are not responsible for the abuse.
“You are not crazy; you were forced into the emotional mind.”
Living just with the reason mind may not be the best either. It can lead to a very surface level, cold, and robotic life with an inability to connect to others. This lack of emotion is where narcissism can live. Thus, there needs to be a balanced combination of the emotion mind and the reason mind. This is recognized as our wise mind. We do need emotion because it is a guide to what we desire and need in life. We also need reason because it can produce logical outcomes for us.
How does narcissistic abuse influence our minds? Narcissism can push us even more into the emotional mind. We begin making choices that are very reactionary due to an increase in the amount of fear that a narcissist can create. We may fear to lose any love or affection, so we grasp on to anything in order to keep it and to feel accepted. The only thing that we receive are tiny breadcrumbs that we desperately hold onto. The cycle continues as our self-worth slowly fades away. It’s important to ask yourself why you put yourself in these positions because there is a logical reason that will make sense. Become the observer of your own life. It is only when we begin to increase our self-awareness and understanding that we can view ourselves as confident, capable, and worthy. Then we are able to make the rational choices that correspond to our purpose and identity. We then learn that what we experienced was not love but control. The love was one-sided. We were alone in the relationship. We deserve to find the love that we are capable of giving. It is possible to find the road that will lead to a more fulfilling and happier life. It is always up to you!